What dar?!

Mood: very open, possibly unwittingly drunk
Music: Green Day - American Idiot

This might be the most heathen thing I've ever admitted to, but if I were to ever do a strip tease, it would most definately be to the tune of Smashing Pumpkins' "Zero" and may or may not incorperate black leather and a red cowboy hat. (Yeehaw!)

Ha ha! Fly free, oh inner whore!

Anyways. Funny story about something that happened this past weekend.

It all started when the brother and I arrived at The Father's house in Durham, and upon our arrival him deciding it was the right time to inform us that his "friend from work" might be dropping by.
No less than two minutes later said friend from work pulls up infront of the house (immaculate timing, I must admit) and reveals themself as a hot blonde 43-year-old co-worker who totally looks about 30. The visit was alright with me, because rarely do I get the chance to interact with other females whilst visiting my lone-wolf single-parent Father (and also, for once he was not checking out someone young enough to technically be my sister). In a rather successful attempt to establish commonground with said other female, who will from this moment forward be known as 'Kayla', I requested that The Father skip forth to the LCBO and bring me some raspberry zinfindel in order to demonstrate how nice and well-trained I have him.
Upon returning from his jaunt to the liquor store, he promptly served me a glass of my beloved raspberry-tasting alcoholic beverage in order to demonstrate to Kayla what a gentleman he is.
Which is just dandy. And so the three of us enjoyed a lovely noon-hour retreat beneith the gigantic maple tree. However, after a while The Father quickly nipped inside and (to underscore the fact that he's a real gentleman) returned with a refilled glass of alcohol for his little 18.5 BMI non-drinking daughter who had on this particular occasion overlooked her breakfast.
...Oh boy.
Not to be rude, I accepted the beverage and as it disappered, fought the growing urge to lay down on the grass and gab about how nice and pretty everything is. I also found myself conciously reminding myself quite often to pay attention to the conversation which I was progressively drifting away from. And then the thought occoured to me: "Oh. My. God. I am drunk. At one o'clock in the afternoon."

And so I died a little inside.

Ta Da!