attempted redemption

What a riviting 48 hours. Where shall I begin...
Let's provide a little explanation for the previous post. That took place yesterday afternoon when I was extremely pissed off at Derek for letting me down once again by breaking his promise, that he freely made, not to fool around with anybody untill the end of summer. The best part is that he did it right in front of me too, isn't he a gentleman - by holding hands with Blondie in the van. SHOCKER! Anyhow I, let's say, wasn't thinking too highly of him yesterday as I was writing, trying to clear my head, and while I was reflecting I posted bits and pieces of old e-mails including a poem that he wrote. At this point in time I really could care less about him and what he felt because that was pretty much the same attitude he'd given me. I knew he wasn't happy about it... but then I started to realize that by posting this stuff I was not only betraying him, but I was betraying myself and what we had - the only thing I cared about in the first place. I completely pulled a Fred Durst on him, and God, did I ever feel like a shit head! I still do kind of, but now I've done everything I can to make it right and just hope he's not uber pissed at me or 'disapointed' in me or whatever, I even called him at work to apologize and if I knew of any other way to make up for my mistake I'd gladly do that too. Anyways, once Mikey caught a glimpse at this I guess the thing spread like wildfire and now the whole group knows and has taken the liberty to incorperate some of my quotes into their screen names - much appreciated, champs. Now, what did I just say on the topic of shit heads? ...Any takers? ...Fabio, you with me champ?

Well, babysitting is in the works for tomorrow, rather early I might add. I'd best be heading off. I also have an appointment at that place where the special people go so I should be getting nice and rested up for my big day.